In this moment, this single and rare moment of clarity, I begin to see the things I have not before seen. At the very realization, the tears fall like rain. No, not a tragic and tumultuous rain but more like a gentle rain that cleanses the Earth and washes away the dust that prevents the true colors of life to spring forth.
My poor soul has run a marathon it seems these last few years in particular. I'm grateful for the learning. Immensely so but there has been this one thing I just could not understand and I tried and tried again to get it...and I couldn't until I lost something important to me...or rather, found something important to me I didn't know was lost. And now ans the realization sinks ever deeper into my weary soul, I know without a doubt that it is in fact time for great change.
I will from this moment forward treat myself gently, tenderly and with great respect. I will not engage in ego-battles with anyone and will disengage in ego battles once they have begun. I will strive to own my own place in this world and ensure that I am taking care very well of my own responsibilities and obligations not to exclude the assistance of others but to refuse ever to be a burden. I will nurture my desire for poetry, music and philosophy. I will strive to be more complementary. I will pay better attention to my spiritual lessons so that I can demonstrate true spiritual wisdom as I walk through the days of my life. I shall hold compassion above judgment in every interaction. I shall take better care of myself, stand tall, self-secure and physically fit in this most amazing of worlds. I will strive to develop greater emotional and intellectual understanding of all the mechanisms that make up the frame work of this world. I will treat all beings of life with great respect and honor. I will focus realistically and honestly so that I may properly assess my horizons and discern the most appropriate directions more promptly. I will free myself from the illusory entanglements I have created. I will seek to understand the true meaning of partnership and strive to understand the true sacred nature of surrender. I will let people be exactly who they are without my interference and at the same time, I will tolerate no ill behavior in others. I will strive for understanding and engage only in direct dealings with never a single ounce of manipulation of anyone or anything to get what I think I may want. If what I want does not come to me on my own efforts honestly and with the highest integrity, I do not want it truly. I will be there for those that I love fully and understand when they need space - I will love unconditionally. I will strive always to be a true friend and trustworthy confidant. People need a completely safe place to express themselves. I will never engage in any act or thought that exploits the sensitive wounds of others nor will I engage in interactions with others who refuse this control through personal integrity.
These are the qualities I wish most to have around me and so, I know, that I must ensure that I am these things. We must be what we most hope to see in this world. It starts close to home, within, deep inside the hearts of us. These are no easy tasks to master, I assure you but I am more than confident in my ability. You see, I've had many wonderful teachers in these things and rather than resent the method of their attempts at training the rougher aspects of my rebellious being, I shall honor them and forgive them and be those things they attempted unwittingly to teach me...those things I called them forth for the soul purpose of my desired education. And, so, a new path begins.
(c) 2012 Jaie Hart (photo, random but beautiful internet find)
My poor soul has run a marathon it seems these last few years in particular. I'm grateful for the learning. Immensely so but there has been this one thing I just could not understand and I tried and tried again to get it...and I couldn't until I lost something important to me...or rather, found something important to me I didn't know was lost. And now ans the realization sinks ever deeper into my weary soul, I know without a doubt that it is in fact time for great change.
I will from this moment forward treat myself gently, tenderly and with great respect. I will not engage in ego-battles with anyone and will disengage in ego battles once they have begun. I will strive to own my own place in this world and ensure that I am taking care very well of my own responsibilities and obligations not to exclude the assistance of others but to refuse ever to be a burden. I will nurture my desire for poetry, music and philosophy. I will strive to be more complementary. I will pay better attention to my spiritual lessons so that I can demonstrate true spiritual wisdom as I walk through the days of my life. I shall hold compassion above judgment in every interaction. I shall take better care of myself, stand tall, self-secure and physically fit in this most amazing of worlds. I will strive to develop greater emotional and intellectual understanding of all the mechanisms that make up the frame work of this world. I will treat all beings of life with great respect and honor. I will focus realistically and honestly so that I may properly assess my horizons and discern the most appropriate directions more promptly. I will free myself from the illusory entanglements I have created. I will seek to understand the true meaning of partnership and strive to understand the true sacred nature of surrender. I will let people be exactly who they are without my interference and at the same time, I will tolerate no ill behavior in others. I will strive for understanding and engage only in direct dealings with never a single ounce of manipulation of anyone or anything to get what I think I may want. If what I want does not come to me on my own efforts honestly and with the highest integrity, I do not want it truly. I will be there for those that I love fully and understand when they need space - I will love unconditionally. I will strive always to be a true friend and trustworthy confidant. People need a completely safe place to express themselves. I will never engage in any act or thought that exploits the sensitive wounds of others nor will I engage in interactions with others who refuse this control through personal integrity.
These are the qualities I wish most to have around me and so, I know, that I must ensure that I am these things. We must be what we most hope to see in this world. It starts close to home, within, deep inside the hearts of us. These are no easy tasks to master, I assure you but I am more than confident in my ability. You see, I've had many wonderful teachers in these things and rather than resent the method of their attempts at training the rougher aspects of my rebellious being, I shall honor them and forgive them and be those things they attempted unwittingly to teach me...those things I called them forth for the soul purpose of my desired education. And, so, a new path begins.
(c) 2012 Jaie Hart (photo, random but beautiful internet find)
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