Friday, October 17, 2008

Morning Contemplations Again

Again, this morning, I stepped outside in the still and cool of the morning to gather my thoughts for the day ahead. It’s been a rough week in terms of being very busy, standing in awe of the moonlight, contemplating my life and its accomplishments, my shortcomings and out-and-out failures. Why at the beginning of the day my mind is flooded with these things, I’ll never know. I just have gotten used to the way my mind works and use this time each morning as an opportunity to seek the crystal clarity I’ve missed, look for the things I’m grateful to have and have seen and consider the days and weeks ahead. I’m peaceful this morning. I have been for days but my mind is stirring with the excitement of my new job and I’m troubled trying to sleep at night. It’s not a bad thing. I think I liken it to the feeling of a child reading herself mentally the night before the first day of school at the end of summer. You know, that nervous excitement of return, re-greeting friends of old and making new ones.

I’ve got some good plans for the weekend. Tonight its all about simple self-care. I get to have a girly night on my own to color my hair, paint my nails and lounge around in my favorite PJs. I plan to come home, relax with a glass of wine and enjoy a peaceful evening. I’ll catch up on my email, my researching new stocks, catching up on the political happenings of this week that I’ve missed and work on my 5 year plan in more detail. I’ve realized that when you complete milestones, it’s important to set new goals and map out the steps you will take to realize your accomplishments along the way. You also have to make sure that you plan to just take care of yourself from time to time. I’m frequently the last on my list. The kids come first, the cat, my friends, my work, the car and then if there is time me. However, I do put myself first with my weekly tennis lesson. Our instructor just extended our class for another 8 weeks. Yeah!!!! I’m excited about that.

I’m excited about endings and beginnings. I’m grateful for both painful and joyful lessons. I’m thoughtful and hopeful about my present and future. I’ve got a deep faith in myself and my abilities to make my life meaningful, worth living and successful. I’m so grateful for that alone. That one thing will help ensure my success in every area of life. You have to believe in yourself and remove all the barriers that exist to achieving that feeling. If you don’t, life becomes bleak, miserable and depressing. We have to set for ourselves reasonable expectations and sometimes those expectations must be low and brought to the point of just getting through the day. Such days shouldn’t be disheartening. They should be viewed as quiet moments…those moments where you shut everything else off and focus on the basics of existence. A few examples to illustrate what I mean here are, getting out of bed, showering, making yourself presentable, taking care of responsibilities and obligations, finding time to relax, journaling about those things that you appreciate in life, stopping to smell the roses, eating good and healthy food, finding a few minutes for some form of exercise, talking to family and friends. There are challenging days and beautiful days and they should be strung together with hope, faith and love.

My thoughts are interesting to me this morning. They spin around in circles, roaming outward and spinning back, swirling up and down and through memories and dreams. It’s good I think because I feel like I’m in a good place, ready to face the day, spend some time on me as well as with a very good friend of mine. Then it’ll be all about chores and starting my second week of my new job. Life is good no matter how hard it seems.

The thought for the day is to find a measure of hope to hold onto, find something within you that you can believe in and set a course in your life that will allow you to enjoy the beautiful adventure it was intended to be. Peace!

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