Triggers are a funny thing and nothing launches our being into ire more than quickly than a person who has triggered us, made us angry or hurt. We wish to blame them, attack them for triggering us and make them suffer as we suffer. But, and there is always a but now isn't there....The person who triggered you is not to blame for your pain. The reality is the "trigger" person is a messenger in disguise. You can take the egotistical road and attack them, blame them, insult them for making you angry but all you are really doing is continuing to feed a very painful illusion that you, yourself, has created. I know, I know, this is going to be like a big heaping spoon full of the nastiest medicine you've ever had to take but stay with me a moment and maybe you just might understand and set yourself free once and for all from the trigger.
We get angry when someone makes us feel bad about us...and we feel bad when triggered only because we believe unconsciously (very unconsciously) that someone has exposed us - or rather, exposed a very sensitive and wounded part of us that we believe somehow is justified but do not want to believe. Take the issue of abandonment - hot, hot, hot topic as we all have abandonment issues at some level. So, someone we thought should be there in a certain way in our past left us, didn't support us or ignored us and we, feeling lost and not understanding what was happening, formed an assumption about us - that we are not worthy as evidenced by what someone important to us did or didn't do. So, then, forever after in our lives we will be triggered when people leave us or in some way disregard us. We are triggered so that we might take the opportunity to better understand the original wound and finally and fully heal it. The truth is, people do the only things they know how to do and sometimes, they make bad decisions and leave us hopelessly and helplessly as collateral damage and it hurts. If we form any unthinking assumptions about us, we condemn ourselves to being easily triggered for life. If we go on through our lives always blaming and attacking those who trigger us, we are missing beautiful opportunities to go within and heal the wound that created the trigger to begin with. We can shoot the messenger but that only reinforces the original wound leaving us helplessly trapped.
Its a terrible situation. But, we can step out of that vicious circle/cycle and realize that we always were worthy of love, worthy of caring, worthy of consideration and someone just did not know how to give you that at a key moment in time when your opinions of you were just developing. We have to realize that when we give away our power to the person triggering us through attack and blame, we are only feeding the original wound. The truth is that no one has the power to make you feel anything but you. To believe otherwise is to marry yourself miserably to one of life's greatest illusions. Don't do it. It's a terrible, miserable marriage that will leave you broken your whole life. Stop the egotistical low-road thinking and grab hold of your power and use it to find the core of the trigger and heal it. If you can do this, you'll never be triggered and suffer needlessly on this issue again. In every moment we have the opportunity to chose darkness or light. When you choose blame for your own emotions, you are choosing to remain mired in darkness - it is you making you suffer. You are a beautiful soul, worthy of love, worthy of light and you do not have to suffer at your own hand and realize truly that it is your own hand. Learn to find the wound, learn how to heal it and free yourself from one of life's greatest illusions. Stand in your own light and taste the delicious emotional freedom that comes with healing.
Blessings of patience, understanding and courage for your journey dear ones. I pray you find the highest love and healing light within you. You do have the power.
(c) 2012 Jaie Hart
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