Integration

After a peak experience a few weeks back, life somehow feels quite different to me.  I wish I could put my finger on exactly what has changed or how but it’s too nebulous and wonderful for that. My thoughts this morning turn to one simple word that is not so simple at all, integration.  This dream we are living is more amazing than we realize.  My faithful readers won’t be shocked to hear me say “Life is amazing.”  I say it in just about every post and yes, it is a message I do try to impart through all my human interactions.  Peak experiences can be positive or negative depending on the emotions you choose to attach to them.  I’m certain you’ll never guess which view I hold between positive and negative.  I view all experiences as positive even when going through an experience might be particularly challenging for me in some way or in every way.  I guess I’ve realized along the path that has been my life that even though some parts of the road may seem stark, dark or painful and frightening, our experience is ever enriched by every single thing we go through.  Or thoughts about what we experience further shapes the sum total of the experience for us.

Through integration of an experience, we take in what is most meaningful to us and leave behind that which we have already learned or, well, have no further interest in learning.  I find myself in a time of integration.  The past several years of my life have been nearly indescribable in some ways.  If I wrote it all out right here and right now, I’m sure the things I’ve seen and experienced might seem quite outlandish at times, strange or even make me seem a bit, um, touched, I’ll say.  Touched is actually a very good word with many and varied implications.  Again, I’ll lean towards the positive realizing I have been deeply touched by people, visions, inspirations, nature and most important of all, love.  Maybe love is not so much categorized here in the typical sense or understanding of it.  It’s broader than that, much broader.  I could also add, all encompassing, weaving its way through every thought and vision as I went about some quite ordinary  and quite out of the ordinary seeming interactions within existence.

I have been on a very long pause, while trying to integrate all of the inputs and downloads that made their way into my psyche, my consciousness and my being.  Life is but a dream, the old childhood song goes and this is true.  But, this dream is very real based on my specific space-time orientation and I truly intend to make the absolute best of it.  I realized in my travels that I came to this place to learn and to better improve my own understanding of love in its myriad facets.  I can honestly say that I have learned so much and that I am so very grateful for this opportunity at this point in space-time to exist in the physical.  I look out into this world and I realize, just like the stars seem to shine individually with no seeming connection between them...the empty space in between is not so empty at all...just like the space between us here on Earth or elsewhere in the cosmos.  That empty space between us is not so empty and it is that thing or stuff that we cannot perceive that is the glue that connects us all.  It has nothing to do with our humanity or spirituality, it just is what it is – there...pulsing...moving...supporting and strengthening without being seen.   We just have no words or framework with which to define it.  Science begins to and Metaphysics does too.

With all these coffee-induced mental meanderings this morning and thoughts firing lightning speed in volumes and to spaces that are beyond my ability to follow each nuance an end...I am content just to be.  I’ve never before felt so ethereally and physically alive and comfortable within the confines of my own skin.  I take that as the gift of understanding that it is for me.  It’s been a long time coming.  There are many experiences you must integrate into your understanding to achieve the goals with which you set your own life plans.  Your experiences will repeat until the understanding dawns and your true understanding expands and the process just continues.  Rather than waiting for an event to feel the sentiment of achievement or satisfaction, do it now for the pure and beautiful act of living and appreciating this now.  There is no destination you suddenly get to and say, “See, there, I did it.”  None of us gets out of here alive.  At least not in the physical.  So, enjoy every breath and step on your journey and realize the gift that your life here in the physical is.  If you feel you lack love in your experience, know that you have the power to create it...the seeds have always been within you.  That spark of divinity with which you were so beautifully created gives you amazing power to enrich your own experience from inside of you and with trust and faith it will manifest without if and when you choose to make it so.

I wish you more than love and light as you journey through your lives, I wish you patience, openness of heart and mind for greater understanding too.  Know you are a beautiful miracle just as you sit there breathing and reading this little blog post of mine.  Peace be with you always and ever.

(c) 2013 Jaie Hart (photo is a fortunate random internet find - thanks google images!)