Pulsing Stars

I don't dream very often but last night I dreamed all night long.  The dreams were one scene after another of friendship, love, congenial interactions, warm atmospheres, new and fun things.  The dreams were so simple and yet so very real.  I enjoyed them all very much.  The night went on and even more dreams played as my body and conscious mind rested.  The fun part about this night of dreaming was that I remembered every single detail as if it occurred in waking consciousness.  I don't remember dreams that often but when I do, I pay attention.  With pleasant dreams floating through my mind, I really just wanted nothing more than to stay in bed and just sleep.  I woke between every single dream but went right back to sleep. 

At some point, early in the morning, my dream scene changed quite notably in comparison to those earlier that night.  I was asleep and yet semi-conscious.  There was pure black in my field of vision but that soon started to change.  A light began to glow from very far away in my mind's eye.  Entering my field of vision came a pulsing radiant bright white light that suddenly gave way to what looked like shooting stars or fireworks on the 4th of July.  I was quite amused at this display and was going to tell my visual mind to go back to sleep but just then the bright white light grew stronger and the pulsing shooting stars grew more rapid until they actually roused my conscious mind completely.  Once conscious, the stars and light dissipated into the pure darkness.  I opened my eyes and looked at the clock.  4:51 a.m. 

Uh oh, I thought.  I forgot to set my alarm.  It normally goes off at 4:30 a.m.  Yes, I know - stupid thirty, right?  Rather than become alarmed that I was running late at starting my morning routine (and wondering how I had shut off my alarm without realizing it last night), I was laughing in the dark because I realized I had another kind of alarm working in my favor.  I hurried about my routine and that moment of bright white light and beautiful pulsing, shooting stars set a mood of amazing wonder and curiosity for my day.  It's a good thing too.  I've got a stressful week to  manage and being late to work just wouldn't have helped me.  But, thanks to my fortunate vision of the stars and the beautiful and gentle awakening that followed, I made it to work right on time and had an amazing day even if an incredibly busy one.

The moral to the story is that if you look for silver linings, you will see them.  If you expect all to go well, it will...and even if it doesn't go just as you had planned, you will be given the grace to manage life in a moment.  If you refuse to look for silver linings, you'll never ever see them and will sadly miss out on an opportunity to giggle in the dark for no reason at all -- Thoughts noted to self for further future reinforcement.  I'm going to have a great rest of my week thanks to a beautiful display my unconscious mind shared with me.  I hope you find the wonder to keep looking for the wonderfully unexpected in your lives.  If you trust it will be there, it will be. ~Blessings.

(c) 2012 Jaie Hart (photo was a random but beautiful internet find).

Compulsive Silver Lining Seeking

There are those times we will be called upon to endure some of life's more difficult challenges...things that rock our security, situations that press the edges of our seemingly gossamer string hanging sanity.  But, through it all, you hold the grace and strength within you to master the moment, to master your emotions and to find the courage within you to face all of the elements that are your life.  As dark or bleak as things may sometimes seem, allow yourself to become a compulsive silver lining seeker and you will transform yourself in moments of darkness into pure and beautiful feelings and emotions of love and light and it is this ability that will carry you through.  Master the fear and worry about what might happen or could happen.  Take a breath and be very present in every now moment...let your internal senses reach out beyond your person and your local world...feel the rest of the souls and angels that stand there beside you lending you love, light and support and know that you are courageous, you are resourceful and you are loved.  ~Blessings of courage, strength and positive focus dear souls.  You are the masters of your own destiny.  You are beautiful and magical and so very loved.

(c) 2012 Jaie Hart (photo, fortunate random internet find)

Mindful Prisons

How do you show people what is inside of them when they do not wish to see?  Some folks wish to see only their mistakes, only their short-comings and only proof of the world's rejection of them.  In reality, it is only they who reject themselves.  There are myriad reasons why this is so but no one has to stay in that place.  Its so hard when someone truly feels victimized by life and I have actually read articles where folks like me who are out there trying to show the way are blasted for our positive thinking because we weave an unattainable and unrealistic dream.  But, if we have attained that dream, how is it that it can be said we weave an unattainable dream of positivity when we are in fact proof positive that it is attainable?  I cannot help but wonder if the reality is a mistaken understanding of words and actions.

I know a soul who no matter what this soul tries, it blows up in this soul's face. Relationships, jobs, moves to other places...everything blows up always.  But I wonder about this soul's expectations for radical change, moving across country to find the perfect love that perhaps does not exist.  Perhaps this soul is unwilling to go the distance to attain that which this soul strives for...going only half way, expecting the world to change and give what this soul wants and needs without effort when the world doesn't work in the way of this soul's dreams and taking a sort of entitlement approach to things which sadly, always works out much less satisfactorily than is typically expected.  So, perhaps it is not actually the world that lets this soul down but the steps taken and not to attain that which is desired.  And yet, there is no self-accountability at all in this soul.  This soul, at every turn, blames everyone around this soul...blame is issued forth to the government, society, loved ones, the weather but not one ounce of accountability for bad decisions is ever taken by this soul.  And so, it goes that folks like me who paint a silver lining in every situation can become part of the long line of souls to blame for a bad predicament.  The shift in thinking is all it takes to move beyond this and well, the acceptance of personal accountability for decisions, expectations and the unwillingness to do what it would take. 

I can see how it is by far easier to blame society and people like me as the source of all that is wrong in this world.  But in comparison, my life is so good.  I look at a goal and discern the steps required to get there putting no onus or expectation on anyone but me to get me there and if I fail, I know that I missed a step and I'll go back and start again.  I also have my very painful failures but rather than see them as the reason the world is out to make me fail, I realize that I merely discounted something important or I had an unrealistic expectation, maybe I was working with too much fantasy and not enough reality but I'll go back and start again and I always achieve that which I seek.  I am not lucky and there are no coincidences.  I refuse to give up and when I want something, I will find a way to attain it without requiring anyone do anything but me and I refuse to make anyone accountable to give me anything to get to my goal.  I look for opportunities, I take the mistakes and seeming misfortunes, tear them apart to understand what went wrong and then I remap the steps to get to where I wanted to go and then I achieve that which I sought.  I guess I do not understand how that is weaving a false fantasy that is unrealistic.  Well, there is no misunderstanding there for me.  I see it simply a matter of perspective differences.  One person's nightmare is another person's dream, one person's mistake or failure is another person's opportunity and one person's lack of insight is another person's pure and beautiful vision.  Everything, absolutely everything is a matter of perspective.  We make choices in the dark or the light at every step and with every breath we take in life.  When we choose to insult self or blame others for misfortune, we trap ourselves in a prison of our own design.  We forget that it is we who have the key and that that key is our freedom.

So, I understand the victim mentality and how everything goes wrong.  That was me in my late teens and twenties.  But through trial, error, observation and analysis, I learned that the problem with my life was me and no one else.  When I change me and the way I viewed things, everything changed and my life got so much better.  We live and we learn I suppose and each must find his or her way in this world.  There really isn't a wrong or a right.  Victims are not wrong.  They just lack the ability at the time they lock themselves in that prison, to see their view point requires much more energy to get out of than they are willing to put forth.  Vision, accurate assessment of abilities and the tools and ingredients from which we create our life is our decision.  We can change our view and change our lives but it takes willingness and great courage to get to that place.  The journey is the destination.  Our destination in the physical world is death so what are you waiting for?  Get out there and find what doesn't work in your life and find a way to change your perspective so you can get to what it is you truly want.  Set expectations, take the steps to achieve each step on the path to your goal and then one day you'll stand there so satisfied with your progress.  Many helpers will arrive along the path you walk but if you are stuck in your ego and victim thinking, you will outright reject the assistance they came to give you.  Be aware of the decisions you seemingly and unwittingly make.  Those that tell you the things that hurt the worst, well, those are the ones to pay attention too.  Not to own insults or injury, but to understand the root cause of your true emotions and why you choose it.  Discover you.  Discover life.  Live it with meaning and no that you do not have to limit yourself before you even get started by thinking the world is against you.  That is really YOU standing against YOU.

Food for thought, maybe, a little bit...at least?  I hope so.  Change your mind and perspective and you can change your life and your world.  The choices are always yours to make even when it seems this is not so.  Even if you don't understand the concept completely, remain curious enough to strive to explore it.  You won't be disappointed.  Blessings beautiful dreamers.

(c) 2012 Jaie Hart (photo, beautiful internet find)

Blazing Light to Life

I love the stillness in the cool of morning.  Darkness still shadows familiar things until the birds begin to gently sing.  Soon the sun will climb over the horizon setting the sky ablaze with golden light.  Pale blue sky and clouds will gently be replaced by slowly brightening colors of life.  Anticipating the beauty is it's own gift, I think.  The days are always beautiful in life to me but I see things differently often.  Mired of late in this mental state of weeding through thoughts to glean the remaining bits and pieces of lessons learned has left me yearning for the simple beauty that only nature can provide.  As I sit here thinking over a delicious and warm cup of coffee, my mind wanders back through a beautiful memory.  It was a warm summer morning with all the makings of a very hot summer day in gentle progress.  Already I could smell the scent of the grass, summer flowers in bloom and a gentle breeze straying from the ocean.  A butterfly flew across my field of vision and I watched her land on the daisies right next to me.  I was lost in the patterns and colors on her wings, enchanted by the glowing core of the flowers and tasting the freedom of a day with no school.  Childhood memories can be the best and the worst sometimes but that is all a matter of perspective and that which we wish to call to and hold within us.  I choose the light as my point of focus and always patiently await it's appearance.  I am never disappointed in that regard for the light of life is everywhere and in everything.

I step out onto my patio sensing the coming of the sun's first rays.  Under the now dimly lit skies I see my own flowers glowing in the darkness.  I think I feel them more than I see them but the effect is no less mesmerizing to me.  I love Mother Earth's beautiful displays that tantalizing open and waiting senses.  Such beauty is part of what makes this place draw souls like butterflies to beautiful daisies.  Life, is purely amazing.  Life, so rich in color, depth and experience.  It's hard to imagine not holding gratitude for the opportunity just to be present incarnate.  Like a child on a warm summer day do I greet every single day of my life.  You may not think to find freedom in the grown up drudgery of work and obligations but I find great joy in my responsibilities and pure pleasure in taking accountability for my wants, needs and actions.  I've come to a place where victim thinking cannot take hold to one ounce of the light within me.  My light shines so brightly it burns such darkness away.  I am aware of the thinking as I spent most of my life there and then I realized that the happenings in life are not so personal as if to serve only to deter, demean and diminish us.  Life's happenings are meant to test our constitutions, our resilience and beautiful creativity.

This day holds for me opportunities as yet unknown but I hold no fear nor worry at all.  I have agreed to take life as it comes and appreciate every scene as if it were a petal of a beautiful flower unfolding.  The further I go, the essence and fragrance becomes part of my existence.  My energy, my vision and my dreams are alive and I abide not one moment in negative or destructive thoughts.  My heart craves the love and the light and within there is more than an abundance.  You just have to see and look, train your eyes to recognize the beauty, the patterns and love hidden sometimes in the seemingly mundane.  Exit the restless self-aggrandizing ego and embrace the feeling in the soul.  We are by far more powerful than sinking lowly souls crawling for crumbs in the outside world to lift us up by bringing others down, stealing away power and pushing people down.  Unnecessary tools for dishonorable and painful existence are these.  We do not need them.  At any time, any soul can stand up tall and be embraced by the light of love.  Layers of pain and lies may have to be gently peeled away but the love and light are there.  Beneath the surface, like diamonds in coal.  We need only train ourselves to see what is there in all regards and choose our experiences accordingly.  It's so simple that it seems impossible sometimes.  Having crawled on my belly more times than I can count in life, I know the beauty of that moment when you realize no one holds you down or back but you and your own uneducated thoughts. For more than forty years have I studied this ability in life.  I have watched the struggles and the successes...the origins of darkness and light are the same and it is our perception that shapes our actions and they repeat with the same results until we change our view and learn.  Then we can take new action in line with new lessons learned and reach beyond the illusory aspects of our past thinking that seemingly held us down.

We have an infinite ability to rise above and to transcend lower-level thinking and action.  For some the realizing may take much effort and even require assistance at times but the beauty in life is that what ever you need and passionately hold in your mind, conscious creation will manifest just what you hold most for you.  When we stop creating in fear, life becomes so interesting.  I think back now to that sunny summer day as a child of 9 born to observe in this life, with a knack for looking always for the light that etches even the dark things in some form of beauty.  Time passes so quickly now and I'm grateful for every warm summer day, for every dark and rainy one too.  I have lived in a beautiful world and had many beyond beautiful experiences.  For 40 years have I studied, for a few more yet, have I just observed and I smile now as even more memories coalesce in my conscious vision. And then it comes, the first rays of the sun.  I'm going to sing her up into the sky along with the birds here in my own way.  For no other reason than the fact that I'm so very glad to be here, so glad to be alive and so honored to see these colors blazing light to life on another glorious day of my life here on Earth.  ~Blessings.

(c) Jaie Hart 6/12 (Photo, random but so beautiful fortunate internet find)