Sunday, December 12, 2010

Stop, Think, Act - Don't React

Driving 70 miles an hour down a long empty stretch of freeway can give you a whole new perspective on life sometimes. Especially on a clear cool night like tonight with only the sound of my own tires speeding down the highway and the wind whipping against my windshield. The sky is pure black tonight, the stars are twinkling in such abundance and I'm so incredibly grateful to be driving in a less populated part of the county. There are lots of homes in south county and stretches without the big city lights always gives me a good feeling. No light pollution obliterating an impressive view of a vast expanse of December sky is truly priceless.

I can't remember the last 10 miles. I remember getting in the car and then suddenly I'm among smaller high rise buildings, merging freeways, and a lot more traffic. It's been a very long day that didn't start out well. I think I may stop checking my cell phone before I get out of bed. I may arise in a much better frame of mind. I can't help but think that sometimes life is just too damn hard to deal with. But then, hey, I'm me...Miss Positive and those feelings last a mere few minutes and are quickly replaced by an impressive army of silver-lining seeking thoughts that will be successful in any endeavor they embark upon. In this, I trust me the most!

So, it doesn't ever matter in life how much you learn and grow, how spiritual you become or how grounded you finally learned to be.  There are just those things that creep into the view that shove you off your center quite abruptly. It doesn't really matter what it is or how it happened. What's important are the things you choose to do next. I believe in pulling back to an observer position, noting all the thoughts and feelings without taking much action except to obtain clarity where clarity may be lacking. Somethings that are not about you can still hurt you to the core. But I sometimes think that is more of an unconscious reaction. If you pull back to an observer position, you can see things from 360 degrees without emotion instead of from a jaded and myopic emotional view.

These things are important...noticing, observing without taking any action but for clarity's sake. Bad things happen sometimes to seemingly good people. The world isn't out to get them and there is no insidious and evil design meant to tear down the light in this world. But, there must be balance. In order for things to work properly, the positive and the negative must be re-aligned to achieve balance. Even batteries must be grounded to work properly...well, so do we. The only way that we can stay grounded is to immediately realize that any intense emotion rising in us should be highly suspect and reigned in quickly in order to make sure every step we take is an action chosen instead of an unconscious reaction. Reactions can cause you even more trouble later so its best to try to get centered no matter what you face, acknowledge emotion, rationalize details, obtain facts and then take appropriate and healthy action for you.  Something important to note is that healthy action does not include getting even with someone who hurt you. Two wrongs do not make a right, ever. If someone causes you to retaliate, you have given them your power. Stop that because YOU need your power with you to stay centered and live a healthier life.

It's not easy being human. We were born with so many challenges. Amnesia to all things spiritual, an ego that may or may not have been developing healthy from birth due to environmental psychology and an awareness that may or may not be foggy or fuzzy in some way. All of these things can be overcome with the right tools and intention but we do have to have focus, we do have to have faith and we do have to have rules of engagement we set for ourselves. There are so many people out of control in this world inflicting their imagined slights and pain on others needlessly, carelessly and painfully. Its really sad. If we add to it by fighting back or getting even, we continue to contribute to the problem instead of engaging in a solution. You have the right to choose how you will be engaged. It just takes the span of a few heart beats to pull yourself back from reaction and get yourself into a mindset of thoughtful action.

These thoughts are the reason I've been distracted 10 miles. I'm disengaging from a reaction. I'm pulling back to an observer position to deal with emotions firing in a very reactive way. But the one thing I do know, while I am off-center, I will take no action other than to sort truth and facts from assumptions and off-based emotion. The inner child will not control this situation because the inner child is impaired in this one thing. Delayed gratification of defense will come but it will come in the form or understanding a certain scenario and taking only harmless defensive maneuvers. Well, that and lots of prayer.

So, the moral to this long-winded story is that you have a brain and you really ought to use that first when an emotionally charged situation arises. You have the right to pause and consider before you allow yourself to become engaged in a potentially unworthy battle. You have so much power within you that is better used in positive action that will be healthy for you rather than negative reaction to something someone presented to you to seemingly hurt you, frustrate you or make you mad. Just stop and think. Just stay balanced. Just breathe. If your intent is to quickly find the wisdom of a situation, your intent will be met with satisfaction. You just have to trust yourself and keep your ego from reaction! I wish you many thoughtful blessings on your journey.

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