Firmer Footing

Cold and alone in the dark,
The chill and my twinkling friends,
The sky is black and vast,
I feel so very small.

I’ve too many thoughts just now,
All clamoring for conscious recognition.
I can almost touch them,
But like smoke, they scatter when I reach for them.

It’s been a long hard emotional journey,
Although life has been infinitely good.
The feeling of stasis overwhelms me,
I feel a drift in a torrential sea.

I stopped struggling some time ago,
And let myself sink below the surface.
I found the silence a comfort,
Even though I felt I couldn’t breathe.

Back to basics and appreciation,
The gossamer thread that holds my mind intact…
That keeps my heart from shattering,
That keeps my soul alive.

I can’t give up so keep swimming.
I keep treading water at times until I tire.
I let the waves crest and wash over me…
Here alone in the blackness.

Although overwhelmed I am hopeful.
I know the dawn is so near.
When the first rays touch my skin,
Enlightenment will crystallize my view.

Until then I’ll just be here…
I’ll breathe and just exist.
The sun will show me the shore is in reach,
And I know I’ll find light and firmer footing.