Love Spells: Why Would You?

So, I was on facebook this morning. I was sipping coffee while feeling ever so grateful for a wonderful day yesterday and a glorious night of sleep and one of those annoying ads popped up on my screen.  I clicked on it out of curiosity (I will spare you all by not re-posting the link) and was surprised to see a web-searched screen of nothing but “Trusted Psychics” who will help you with “Love Spells.”  Now, what I’m about to say please understand, is not out of judgment but an observation from the perspective of knowing human nature and karma.  I’m not here to dispute the power of spells as that is not something I care to discuss.  I also have no desire to dispute the trustworthiness of the psychics involved in helping people with love spells (I will say I would never call one of them though).  I’m concerned about the idea that one person would ever even consider usurping the free will of what they think is the object of their loving affection by using a love spell (or even other measures I’ve observed such as bullying and stalking).

I don’t mean to sound judgmental and I realize I may be doing a little bit of that but not for the obvious reasons you might think.  I’m a very strong proponent and advocate for free will and when it comes to the love department, any person who seeks to force someone else’s hand in love is not in a loving state themselves.  Why would anyone in their right minds wish to become involved with such a person and why would a person who truly loves someone seek to force someone else’s hand through a love spell, bullying or stalking?  If there was true love for the object of someone’s misguided affection, there would be no desire to have a spell cast upon the object of your seeming affection.  There would also be no action taken to otherwise force someone to fall in love with you who is not.  For those who would engage in love spell purchasing, stalking, bullying or other tactics to get someone to love them – these are not loving actions and it is NOT love that you feel. This would be an individual who is misunderstanding love, lacking love themselves and completely misunderstanding the karmic consequences of usurping someone else’s free will.

If you hold unrequited “love” for another and as an action in frustration or desperation you are seeking love spells to force another soul to fall in love with you or even worse, bullying, stalking or engaging in other unhealthy activities to get that soul either into or back into your life, I want you to consider something very important.  I’m not here to judge you.  In fact, I wish only to offer up some advice by far more worthy of your time than expending money on a love spell or energy on potentially unhealthy acts to bring someone into your life by unnatural means. Your desire to possess someone in love or if you find yourself obsessed with having someone in or back in your life, I would suggest to you that these feelings are really a message from you to you that you are in need of uncovering your own self-love within.  Here is why, if you lack self-love or feel you need it from someone outside of yourself in order to be happy or feel okay, you are off center and in need of healing in a very big way.  Until you can face the things that block you from feeling your own self-love, self-worth and self-acceptance, it is not possible for you to truly love another.  The best you could hope for is someone who will engage in a co-dependent type relationship which will bring neither of you real love nor healthy fulfillment.

If you really and truly loved someone with all of your heart, you would place their happiness and right to free will above your desire for obsession and possession.  If you cannot put someone’s right to free will or happiness and autonomy without your interference above your desire for that person, it is not love that you feel.  What this represents is your own need to connect with the love inside of you that will set you free.  Every attempt you make at love without addressing this inner message will only result in perpetuating painful circumstances for you concerning love.

Love is not possession, obsession, control, fear, desperation or any of those things we think we feel when we seemingly love someone we cannot have, who does not love us back or who will not stay with us.  Those crazy feelings of loss and heart ache can stem from so many other things that have nothing to do with what you think they do.  Save the money you might spend on love spells and spend it on therapy, self-help books or retreats to help you find what within you blocks your own love.  Sometimes we truly do love others but come to the realization that because of that love, we will let them go to exercise their free will to find their own happiness without our involvement or interference.  Unrequited love sometimes seems so harsh but I fiercely question whether unrequited love has any origins in love at all, or is it just an attempt at control.  Knowing what I know about love, it is hard when we do love someone and for some reason they must leave us.  If we truly love them, we can let them go with love.  If it’s someone we haven’t even been involved with that we think we love – question that love.  Is it real?  Is it just an idea?  Would you really want to have a spell cast on someone or wouldn’t you rather heal within, find your own self love and then attract to you someone who freely loves you using their free will to come forth and join with you in a loving relationship?

The karmic impact of forcing someone’s hand is just not something I would ever contend with.  Some decisions we make without understanding the true nature of our desire can have very far reaching consequences.  Sometimes we just have to wake up and realize that the object of our desire may not be “ours” for a very good reason.  That reason should first be questioned and responded to within.  Never should we take any action to circumvent the free will of others through love and desire.  This, in the end, would create so much pain for you.  Maybe you can’t see it right now but if you think you are in pain now without the object of your seeming affection or desire, imagine how much worse off your soul would be if you engaged in any action, spiritually or physically to force someone to come to you.  Even if you could do that, why would you?  That, to me, would be evidence of self-loathing.  Those who love themselves truly would only want someone who wants to be there with them.  This may be hard for some folks to understand but I hope this article sheds a little more light.  Forget the love spells to make others love you and realize that YOU love you somewhere deep down inside. You ARE worthy of having the right person for you to love using their free will to get there.

I pray that all find the ability to strip away the darkness and pain that prevents them from feeling fully their own love and light from within.  Until all souls can find this space within and all do have the potential, we’ll fall prey to nothing but pain and loss without understanding.  It’s best to step out of these perpetuating cycles of pain and get to the true source – lack of being in touch with our own self-love than to force someone else to love us.  We are worthy of love – no doubt but we must truly feel that within ourselves rather than looking for the outside world to validate this fact.  If we only look to the outside world to validate our loving worth, we will find that the world will only reinforce our fear that we are unworthy of love.  It’s so strange how it works.  Our every fear and painful wound is exposed by the play going on all around us that is life.  It’s like this for a reason.  Exploring our own internal actions, reactions and feelings to understand them is always a better place to start.  Human beings are so complex and human relationships seemingly even more so.  But, if we look within with love, compassion, courage and understanding, we will find our own self-love and it will shine so brightly that others will be attracted by that and the need for love spells, potions, stalking or bullying will become tired and worn negative tactics no one would ever consider engaging in.

I need more coffee and to get better about ignoring ridiculous ads on facebook.  I’m also a bit frustrated by some of them because they give the truly gifted intuitive and psychics such a bad name.  I’m sorry but I also feel a bit protective of those unaware souls who might fall prey to schemes propagated by others, just to make profit from confusion or others in pain.  We need to create a world where we don’t take advantage of our desire for love or our fear of being hurt.  Wouldn’t that be an ad worth responding to? ~Blessings for a beautiful day!

© 2013 Jaie Hart (photo, random internet find)