Long and restless night feeling my way to the stars through a thick blanket of fog. For many moments I stared up into the gray wondering about this restless feeling that seems to have settled itself over my soul. I have no answers or tendrils of clues to trace back to nebulous origins. Sometimes I suppose these feeling just are what they are and not really anything to become overly focused on. What we focus on we do most definitely create and more than anything in this world, I do not wish to create more of this. Sometimes I think the soul must wrestle with its own perceptions and divining of the truth whatever that truth may be and in such times I think, perhaps, we merely hold on and go along for the ride and see where it takes us in mind and thought without giving too much weight to the feelings. Feelings can be tricky. Especially with thoughts firing off unbidden at lightning speed. Sometimes mine move so fast and generate emotion while being entirely unnoticed by me until its too late and I’m stuck with the resulting emotion. In time I think the thoughts will slow down, come back around like the Earth orbiting the sun and the moon orbiting the Earth. It’s not really necessary to be so overly analytical that we must stop and think or trace each thought.
Sometimes we just have to be who we are and let the mind work as it works associating emotion as it chooses to associate emotion. Sometimes just being very present with mind, heart, body and soul is all that is called for. We must know definitively that nothing is really wrong at such times. We are complex creatures with an ego, wounds and emotion that sometimes overtakes us. Again, there is no need to get excited, I have learned the hard way. It’s important at times that we learn how to just detach and observe the happenings in our own bodies and minds in the complete absence of judgment. It is no easy thing because we are conversely trained to pinpoint and react to everyone and everything. The point I make is that despite our unconscious training in this regard, it isn’t necessary to do anything but be.
It’s overcast and the air is moist and has a tinge of chill in it. Chilly for California is below 70. I know, "Ya’all are a bunch a wimps out west," you might be thinking. That may be but it’s all relative I suppose. We know folks in other states who freak out in traffic but here in California we’ve become so accustomed to it. Me, I don’t mind the traffic any more. It is a reality I must contend with. If I resist it, my feelings of anxiety and frustration will persist and only make the experience worse. So, I arm myself with really good music and fully enjoy the opportunity to drive at whatever speed and listen to music that moves my soul in beautiful ways. Everything, as I so often say, is truly a matter of perspective. If you don’t like what you are seeing or experiencing and truly understand you have no power to externally change people and situations, you go deeper within armed with a very important piece of knowledge: You always have the power to change how you perceive something, you can begin seeking deeper understanding and looking for the opportunity in an otherwise dismal seeming string of events. What you focus on you create, as I said. So, for me, I focus on silver linings whether I can see them or not. By the very act of holding those thoughts, I will create it and I will understand. Much like the situation I find myself in now. If I hold the potential for an eventual positive outcome and clarity of vision for that which I now experience, it will come to me. That—is a beautiful fact, one that I treasure.
Thanks for stopping by to read my mental meanderings. I so appreciate your presence here in more ways than one and if anything I hope there is something here in any of my posts that might leave you with pause to reconsider thoughts, feelings and judgments. Maybe, just maybe, something here might give you hope that you can push past the nebulous, push past the limits of negative thinking and reap the beautiful rewards of a new vision or a new more clear perspective. ~Brightest blessings of love, light and beautiful clarity of thought dear souls!
(c) 2012 Jaie Hart (photo, random internet find)
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