Friday, November 27, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
I'm sitting shore side again, thinking really big thoughts again while trying not to go in too deep. I've had a lot to ponder of late...new thoughts, new experiences, spectacular views and lots of new people showing up in my life. Honestly, I welcome the distraction. Each person that crosses my path pulls me out of the painful thoughts and feelings in my heart and mind. Sometimes there can be such a thing as too much self-awareness and introspection. But, I just don't want to think about that any more right now. At the moment, my heart and thoughts are drawn to the sea...the waves are crashing in larger than life, peaceful and forceful turquoise blue...the cool salty air, the cry of the gulls...Oh God what this view does to my soul! Good medicine; very good medicine.
I've spent many moments shore side this weekend. I've been so busy processing tough and very deep emotions--wondering what I've done wrong and what I've done right... wishing, hoping, tears falling. But, yet, inside my core I'm smiling. I'm so happy to be here at this point in time. I'm waiting for a new direction and I feel it coming...the initial thoughts and energy of that just beginning to permeate my soul. I'm crystal clear with absolute acuity on where I've been. But, like the mists on the water this day...preventing the view, I realize I'm not sure where it is that I'm going just yet. I don't know how I'll get there. I don't know who I'm meeting but I know it is many someone's significant. It's learning time just now. That concept is so hard to articulate sometimes but maybe I've had enough thought for now. I know I feel enough right now and for now, it is simply enough to put one foot in front of the other as this beautiful journey continues.