Energy Feed

Life is so very interesting and our individualized behaviors even more so.  A common theme among all the themes is the way  human beings seem always to be attempting to find love and happiness by connecting themselves in energetically to others.  In many cases, this is done quite mutually and beneficially but it often doesn’t last, the happiness part and so we disconnect the energy, recoil and regenerate from this seeming vacuum devoid of our own ability to generate happiness and love for a time until we heal.  Once healed, we strike out again and again and yet again.  The same behavior repeats over time.  In some cases, this is not done mutually and one party manipulates and hooks into someone else’s energy because they have lost their ability to connect to Source and fill up on Universal energy, Source-life-force energy, if you will.  Its very tragic for all involved and it is such an important lesson to learn.

I never truly understood that is what we did on instinct and that we did it without understanding why. 

I’ll get to the why in just a moment but in the mean-time, let me explain a little about how this illusion was demystified for me.  It was demystified through a lot of pain and run in after run in with soul after soul who hooked into my energy in a very negative way.  I am no victim, I just didn’t understand what was happening.  I became very energetically sensitive after a near death experience almost 14 years ago.  So much information came back with me and yet floated around in my brain waiting to be triggered.  Time after time I felt the “plug in” of others and didn’t notice what was happening at first.  When over time I’d become drained, tired and suddenly feeling like I was in a fight for my life and nothing was all that seriously wrong, I realized I needed some time on my own to uncover the pattern.  Through suffering the pain and vengeance of cutting off someone’s source of happiness and love through me, I learned that we all plug into others without really thinking about what we do.  We subconsciously need happiness and love but what we are really seeking in our very uneducated desires and actions is a feed the easy way – from outside of ourselves.  We expect and demand that others provide that love and happiness for us not knowing that we are fully and completely capable of fulfilling ourselves.  When others fail us as they will through no fault of their own, we are lost.

If we are in need and we hook into someone’s energy to make us happy or feel loved and then they become drained and unhappy and then leave us, we become angry, seemingly, because someone has cut us off from our supply of love, joy and happiness.  We may even sink so very low that we may fight to get them back, guilt, shame or bully them into coming back to us so we can get our fix without thinking of what that is doing to the other person.  We really don't care as long as we get our happiness and love fix through their energy.  When they refuse to come back we think we are angry at them and we must punish them for leaving us high and dry but the truth is, in this kind of situation, they didn’t leave us high and dry at all.  We have merely forgotten how to plug into the universal supply of love, light and energy that is in complete abundance everywhere on this planet and throughout the galaxy.  When others can no longer feed whether conscious or not on our energy, and they have cut themselves off through pain from their true Source love and light within, it can seem a rather dire and crazy-making situation.  Any soul can step back from poorly patterned behavior and relearn what was forgotten.  We are very resilient in learning new habits, undoing them, embracing old, undoing them, creating new again and embracing them.  It is no different.  Our souls know how to do this on thier own.

I have noticed those on dating sites who are still married, going through a divorce, desperately seeking another energy source or you may know of some married person going through divorce already hooked up emotionally with someone else.   Some souls losing their source of energy, love and light must replace that source or face dire seeming emotional and unknown to them, energetic consequences.  What they don’t know is that if they stop trying to hook into others for love, for energy and light, it may take some time of wading through the darkness feeling cold and alone but then, the body and soul remember what to do and begin to find ways to self-generate if, and only if, the desperate soul gives up the quick fix of feeding off of others.  For any of you who have given up carbohydrates, you know that they help keep your levels of serotonin up.  When you diet and give them up, what happens to you?  For several weeks until your body reconnects to it’s natural ability to produce serotonin, it may seem like a dark, edgy and depressing ride.  But, the body will heal itself and if it requires help due to other blockages, the medical profession or alternative healers can do wonders.  It is no different for those who have become addicted to hooking into the energy of others for love and happiness.  If they refuse to feed like a vampire on others and fall back into themselves for a time, in about 3 weeks, the body and soul start to reorient.  Within a month, the body begins to ache less and if one can stop the desire for that quick fix and let nature take its course perhaps by even spending more time in nature to regenerate and less time on negative, vengeful and victim-like thoughts, one can begin to plug into the true Source within and receive all the the love and happy energy they need.

The illusions in this world are many.  The quick fixes work and are in abundance really.  But nothing takes the place of healing and learning to Source self-connect.  You can do this through meditation, walking in nature, refusing to depend on others for happiness or love, abstaining from negative thoughts or even other people until one is truly ready to be around others without depending on them for happiness.  To face the fear of alone and cold until you find the pathways back to the Source light and love within is a challenge.  One of the biggest emotional seeming challenges of your life, I’ll add.  At times the way may seem to be the steepest climb but if you will but decide not to fail, to keep a positive attitude and to imagine and feel the success of this endeavor, it can be done.

Not one soul on this Earth is responsible for giving us love and making us feel happy.  That is our job and our job alone.  If you always depend on others with no ability to generate your own, you will always live a dependent life of one disappointment after another in the area of human relationships.  It becomes a seemingly self-perpetuating psycho drama.  Whether conscious or not, it’s all a play for energy when the ego battles come.  The Control Dramas written about so beautifully by James Redfield in the Celestine Prophecy are perfect to explain this a little more.  The dramas are illusions and the only thing that is real is the true love and light that comes not from anyone else in this world but the Source inside of you.  No doubt this is a tall leap to understand.  I could not understand until I felt the ache from both sides fully.  To feel the ache of someone walking away because I had become too much energy weight to carry or to feel the ache of someone I’m walking away from because they had become too much energy weight for me to carry - that’s when it hit me.  When I saw this argument, this struggle and this fight from inside and out and 360 degrees, it all made sense.  Themes in our lives will repeat over and over until we have grasped all facets of an important matter concerning not the behavior of others but our own behavior.

I realize my epiphany will be understood by so few.  But I’m going to put it out there anyway in the hopes that someday, someone who needs it will find it and my words, intent and energy may strike a chord and they too will see the light as I did.  Enough of my rambling for now.  I’m back to watching Netflix for some entertainment.  This thought just struck me out of the blue and the way to write about it became more clear. For whatever reason, I felt strongly compelled to write about this.  I now have done so and can hopefully let this go.  If you wondered, it matters to me that all sides come to understanding so that all may heal and find compassion, true lasting love and happiness.  When this occurs, greater things come for all, I promise.  It may take some effort and patience along with willingness to see that “greater thing” but it will be.  ~Blessings beautiful dreamers for open minds and hearts, eyes that truly see and ears that truly hear.  Much healing, love and light always.

(c) 2013 Jaie Hart (photo, fortunate internet find)